Hey Autism! Let's do lunch!

It was a typical morning at French Fry Inc.  Refueling our tired brains with some coffee.  Regaling my husband how I was mad at him when I woke up because in my dream the night before he had divorced me and wanted to know when he would.  He dryly replied "Not today." and then I got hustling to get that kiddo ready and out the door. 

Sometimes in the mornings I have no idea how long it's going to take him to get ready.  More often than not, there is some extra wiggle room.  I'm grateful for it but it also means I have to keep him entertained and out of trouble till the bus comes all the while getting myself dressed.  I try not to be the hot mess Mama walking him to the bus.  Doesn't mean full make up and hooker heels but I try a quick shower (OK quick spritz of dry shampoo) and make sure I'm dressed in something that looks like I care somewhat about how I look.  ( Yeah even the bra goes on.  I'm fancy like that.)

Usually I whip out the iPad and he's pretty content.  It might mean interrupting me five or six times to show me some quick video I took of him that he thinks is the greatest thing ever, which of course, it is.  Today I remembered the new school lunch menu was probably out and I quickly pulled it up for him.  This kiddo LOVES the lunch menu and a new one to study and memorize, well that ought to buy me a few minutes to go pee alone.
That was until he realized one day did not have the meal listed.  RING THE ALARM!!!!!

Every Thursday, his school does some sort of breakfast for lunch.   It rotates between pancakes, french toast and waffles.  For whatever reason, that last Thursday of the month just listed "Breakfast food".  I'm not sure if the lunch lady was like "Screw it.  It's gonna be the last week of school.  We'll see what we got left" when she was typing it.  All I know is it caused a anxiety attack in a certain 9 year old.

I know autism is a spectrum disorder and most days it's kicking my arse in a spectrum of different ways.   I really was in no mood for a meltdown on what he was going to have for lunch three weeks from now.  Mama Fry was tired from staying up to late last night watching Bravo reality TV.  I had 30 minutes before that bus would be rumbling down my street.  I had to talk this kiddo off the ledge over the mystery of french toast or waffles being served.

So I just put down my toothbrush and said "Oh??? It's going to be a surprise!!! Oh my gosh!  That's so cool!!"

And the kiddo, who equates surprises with parties was like "Oh yeahhhhhh!"

Sensing I was on the right track I decided to play into his ego.  "And you'll know before me and then I'll have to guess when you get off the bus that day.  You'll know but I won't!"

I can hear the gears turning in his head and he delights on pulling one over on me.  Knowledge over mom versus having a hissy fit about not knowing what he will have for lunch three weeks from now.

"LUNCH SURPRISE!!! LUNCH SURPRISE!!!"  and he runs down the hallway away from me and thankfully, a meltdown.  

Crisis averted, for now.  Phew! A year ago, I would of been pulling him off the ceiling to get him on the bus.  There would of been a flurry of emails to his teacher regarding said meltdown.  She probably would of asked the lunch lady for a lunch confirmation.  This is just life with autism some days.   Always on my toes. 

I think I'll have pancakes for lunch today.  Suddenly, I'm in the mood and it's not even a Thursday.  :-)