Thursday, January 23, 2014

The Autism Wrestle

As the kiddo gets older, matures and all these therapies that we do kick in, I see more moments of him really trying to work with his autism.  It's kind of like a tango but both partners want to take the lead.  I'm never sure who's going to do the dip and I'm sure that crazy Bruno judge on "Dancing with the Stars" might jump out of his seat at the end of the performance to declare what went wrong, what he loved and how he wants them to really "bring it" next week. (I don't get that.  Where are they suppose to bring it?  They're on the dance floor already.)  Pfft. Anyway,  you might know what I mean.  As challenges come up, I'm not always sure how it's going to go down in this autism house. 

Take the past few weeks with the weather.  Two snow days, one early dismissal and one delayed opening.  All I see when I read that is CHAOS!!  So much schedule chaos.  To the point that I want to cry when I see the school on the caller ID on my phone.  I really ought to get the ring tone that says "LET'S GETTING READY TO RUMBLE!!!!" I found out late Tuesday night that there would be no school Wednesday.  The kiddo was already asleep.  Was I going to wake him up and tell him?  Oh Hell no.  I'd deal with it in the AM, before coffee, before my body even left the bed.  Yeah, just as smart an idea but I don't wake a sleeping kiddo ever. 

Sure enough he comes running in and hops on top of me while I was sound asleep at 5:12 AM to announce it's school time and with my eyes closed still tell him, "Nope.  Not today kiddo.  Snow day.  They canceled it." It's like I'm new here.  Like he was just going to accept that information as is.  I can literally hear the gears churning in his mind.  He leans over and turns on my nightstand lamp and shines it at me like a mob wise guy shaking me down for information.  "NO SCHOOL?!" So while squinting and trying to remember what day of the week it was and what's going on and why am I sleeping with a kosh ball, I try to patiently explain that there is too much snow and how dangerous it is for buses to be out on the road.  That the good news is, he can go play in the snow.  How much fun that will be and how we'll drink hot chocolate and make popcorn and watch movies. 

Then the wrestling match starts.  I see him trying to work out theses changes.  He likes school.  He likes snow but he can't have both.  Can he accept one for the other?  He asks me several times "School tomorrow??" He's got to know the "first and then" of the situation.  I can't blame him. I've set our life up that way.   Then he announces the order of how he wants his day, if he's to accept this new organized chaos into his life.  I "yes" him to most of it.  (Mama has also woken up with killer head cold.  Going out in this is not on my agenda. Not if I can help it)  He then has to inform my husband, the dogs and pretty much the whole block, loudly of the new schedule.  As much as I would like him to just go with the flow and not grill me a thousand times on the changes, I'll take it.  The alternative is non stop screaming for an hour. 

Just when I go to bed Wednesday night, I find out there is a two hour delay the next morning.  I'm not telling him. We'll just deal with it.  The bus is late. Yadda yadda yadda.  The bigger problem, no lunch will be served and it's one of his favorites on the schedule.  Sorry Teacher.  You're gonna have to deal with that possible wrestling match.  He's on your watch.  Assure him there still will be french fries at dinner.  Mama stocked up.   


  1. Great post! It's a great sign of progress that he can roll with the changes, and that's owing to all the hard work you put in. Remember when he was worried because the school didn't print the lunch menu for a certain day, and you said it would be a surprise lunch? That was huge. You're teaching him to roll with the surprises.

  2. Hello this is Keegan again from the Sluis Academy. That is a cute post and it is definitely a good sign that he is able to cope with the day to day changes that life throws at you. I hope he enjoyed his snow day because they used to be an eventful experience for me as a child. I wonder how he will handle these type of events as he gets older?

  3. While I know first hand how stressful the news for routine is I swear j love your way with words!! I nearly spat my coffee at my kid at the lamp in the face thing, Jesus take the damn wheel!!! Hell I think some came out my nose though lol