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Wednesday, June 17, 2015

Shutting up the hecklers.

Much like a stand up comic, I have dealt with my fair share of hecklers.  Be in online or in public.  Comments said to us about our child given with some serious side eye glare.  The even shadier ones are whispered under their breaths in hopes we don't exactly hear it but everyone around them can.  The online ones are usually even harsher as folks grow a pair of brass ones hiding behind a screen, feeling like they got that last word in when they clicked their mouse.  They too, are doing it more for the crowd that reads it than to the person they are aiming it at.  Just my opinion.

"Look at me! Being all badass online or in public. I can say very rude things when I have no idea about all the variables going on!" Really? Your mom must be SO proud.  Shame she can hang your insults on her fridge.  Maybe she's savvy and has a smart phone so she can whip out your tweets to share with her friends while playing bridge.

I'm curious Know It Alls, how does one teach an autistic child how to do things without taking them out to DO THE THINGS?  Cause I'm pretty sure that's exactly how your parents did it to you.  Some life experiences can't be taught with a firm threat to tan their hides or any of the other bullshit clueless violence that is often suggested by you as the catch all solution to all behavioral problems.

Some of these things are scary to our kids.  Didn't you as a kid have things that scared you?  Maybe you were told to "man up" or to "stop being a cry baby".  You might have been forced to face your fears by your parents. Maybe now, since you know everything, you realize your parents did you a favor by making you face those fears.  So when I take my kid to the restaurant with the loud blender that could potentially scare the crud out of him, that's what I am doing. Maybe he won't "get over it" but he will start to get used to it.  He'll start using those coping skills that I'm constantly teaching him at home out in the real world.

You see, I am all out of fucks to give to your opinions and the only true way I am going to get more and more folks "autism aware" is to keep taking my kiddo out to do all the things I would have done if he was a typical eleven year old kiddo.  I already know that we who do this are making a difference. I see it just by being a loyal customer to several businesses that quickly learned his name before mine.  I'm okay with that too.  He's like Norm from "Cheers" in certain establishments and I'm more than happy to be a hanger on in his entourage. I simply do not care if this bothers you.  You don't own the planet.  I'm not living like a hermit just to please you.  You're going to judge my parenting either way so I might as well do what we feel like doing.

If you are an autism parent reading this, take your kids out.  Screw anyone, anywhere who's biggest goal in life is to be the person that picks on a family of a special needs kid.  Way to set that bar high for yourself, harassing stranger. You're a real thug and I'm sure would do well in prison.

And to the online trolls, please share with me the brand of router you use for your Wifi.  Apparently, it picks on the signal really well under that bridge where you live. You would think with access to the entire global online community, you might actually learn a thing or two.  Or at least some better put downs and insults.  Seriously, I'm beginning to think it's just the same group of four or five people that work at "Internet Trolls Inc." because it's always the same old blah, blah, blah with you guys.  Time for a team meeting for some brain storming because honestly, we bloggers just refer to you as badges we unlock when you find us and comment.

You know what I have planed in a few weeks with my family?  A vacation!  Yep, that's right mofos. I will be bringing our own style of autism awareness across state lines! Time to bring this show on the road.  We work hard to make our kiddo ready for the world and part of that is travel.  So we're going to be in your restaurants, your hotels, your tourist attractions, and all the glamorous rest stops for potty breaks along the way.

Because I don't care how much you heckle me or my Kiddo.  We won't stop living and learning.  It's a shame you don't think the learning part applies to you.

19 comments:

  1. .(...and I meant that in a cheering-you-on-kind-of-fashion... our show travels too, however, referred to as circus... or zoo, at times... lovingly.... of couse... xo)

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    1. We are a circus too! And I love my job as ringmaster!

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  2. We take our show on the Road! I am so done too... I was just talking about this today to a new co worker.

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    1. Hopefully there won't be any repeats of the plane ride a girl had when her mom said she had autism and was going to have a meltdown if she didn't have a hot meal.


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  3. We are always taking family vacations. Meltdowns and all. We just keep going for the better of our kiddos.

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  4. Gotta spread that awareness! We can't keep our kiddos out of society because we offend a few people. They need to live too. =)

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  5. Oh yeah!!! These sad, pathetic losers who heckle us need to get a life. Heres hoping that at some point in their lives, they are blessed with an ASD child in their family so they can see things from a clearer perspective.

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  6. Have a fantastic vacation. I read this today.....http://www.specialneedsjungle.com/its-learning-disability-week-lets-talk-about-the-negative-people-we-meet-in-the-ld-world/

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    1. .... as in, it is aimed at all those hecklers from all sides! :)

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  7. Isn't it sad that people have to sit in judgement. I just got really irritated with a woman staring at us in a restaurant. I sometimes wonder who it is that has the social problems.

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  9. Please ignore all of the people who would judge you. Your responsibility, just like the responsibility of a parent of a child without a disability, is to do your best to plan your trip in the best way to help your child enjoy his vacation while experiencing the least possible amount of stress. I'm guessing that bringing the appropriate food, toys, clothes and finding the best method of transportation and lodging will be much harder for you than most parents, but I'm sure you will do an amazing job of arranging all of these logistical details for your child. Your son - just like my son without a disability - will still probably have some meltdowns on vacation, but every child has the right to travel. And no one should judge a parent who is trying their best to take care of their child even if the kid is having a meltdown. I hope you have a wonderful vacation!

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  10. Your family has a right to be out in this world and enjoy a vacation. Fuck the Judgey McJudgersons.

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  11. I love you. And I love the comments too. As a mama to a 3 almost 4 year old with asd I struggle to go out. I'm not quite at the point yet where I can cope with him, his little brother and the negative stares/comments etc. I so needed to hear this. So thank you!!!

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  12. I don't know if I'm blind, deaf or just crazy, but I've NEVER had a bad experience in public in all our sons 10 years. I've never heard a single comment, and BELIEVE me my husband and I joke our son makes it known we've arrived. I don't know if Ben is just obvious enough that there's no mistaking his autism, or god has drawn a 457 magnum on us that all who would dare say anything believe they see.
    Some days are so frustrating, we almost wish someone could give us a reason to explode rather then implode.
    and on-line? who could care any less what a faceless heartless fraction of humanity thinks. I could never muster a good @!#@ for that.

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