Monday, August 22, 2016

"Is your child on medication?"

Okay, fair warning.  This blog post is going to be a bit of a rant but you all seem to like it when I let my mouth fly, so buckle up! Here I go.

"Is your child on medication? 

You know the only person that's allowed to ask you that?  Or let me put it this way, the only one that SHOULD ask you that?  A medical professional. A doctor.  A nurse. I'll even give you an EMT.  That's it.  Not a single other person should ever even think of saying this to you.

And yet, here I am.  A good eleven years into all this autism stuff with my Kiddo and I heard it again and again and again this week.  Three different people and no, not a single one is a developmental pediatrician in their spare time for kicks.

I'm really getting tired of being asked if my Kiddo is on medication or having it implied like it has never even occurred to us to put him on medication.  It's always said in a tone of "Silly Mama Fry. Aren't you a lucky one to have run into me so I may bestow upon you such an idea." I'm suppose to either bow to their greatness to have told me about it or launch in a diatribe of why I am violently opposed to the idea.

Spoiler Alert! He already is and guess what, it's not the magic bullet that folks seem to think it is. While it may make some symptoms of his autism, OCD, anxiety, and ADD a tad bit better, it's not wiping the slate clean here with the issues and challenges facing him daily.  I have no beef with medication.  Hell, I'm even on some myself! I also have no problem with folks who want to go a different way about it.  If that's your jam, you do you.

What I have a problem with this idea that this is going to be our problem solver cause it's so far from the case.  For every case of kid on them that has seen good results, I can give you countless emails from parents who have tried the latest wonder drug only for their kid to have every horrible side effect known to man and then a few extra.

If you are a teacher, speech therapist, teacher's aide, or any sort of school professional, you know what might be a better way to inquire if the behavior you are seeing in a client and or student is medication or non medication related? Here's how to word it.  My piece of advice to you. I won't even charge ya for it. ;-)

"Have you talked to your child's health care provider about these issues?"

Isn't that lovely? Not only does it address the issue but it reminds the parent just exactly where to go if that is an option that they may want to explore or not.  Boom! You're job is done plus it opens the door for the parent to volunteer information like "Yes, we had to make a recent dosage change." or "Well we have thought about it but maybe it's time."

Pros, I have no problem sharing any information with you about my Kiddo that might help you do your job to the best of your ability.  What I have a problem is when folks who aren't medical doctors starting throwing about the whole medication thing like it's going to be the salvation of my Kiddo that I was too stupid to even think about doing.

I warned ya I was feeling feisty. Now I'll just sit back and wait for all the comments from the pros who think I am Satan incarnate. ;-)

"Is my child on medication?"  only makes me want to reply "Are you on any?" 


  1. Yes and Amen! Though I have to say that if a school person asked me, have I talked to my health care provider about these issues I would most likely get my most sarcastic tone possible and say no, no, what issues are you talking about? But that is just me! Lol! Great piece as always! xo

  2. Yes!!! Well said! My daughters autism teacher said she needs medication. I have it a try but they expected to be so well behaved. It's not a miracle pill and I took her off because they wouldn't address the behaviors at school too. It shouldn't be medicine alone! I am now homeschooling her and most of those behaviors are gone now! :)

  3. As a random observer, I might wonder if medication has helped your child, but would only ask how your child was doing or possibly which interventions you thought had been most useful for your child. But I can't help and have no actual advice for you, only good wishes that things go as well as possible.

  4. Amen!!!! Thank you for saying what so many of us feel.

  5. Amen!!!! Thank you for saying what so many of us feel.

  6. I agree with the spirit of this rant. BUT I ask people all the time and I'm not an MD. I ask because I'm curious as to what people are using and how effective it is. I don't care for the meds my kid is taking and it's clear she needs something. Maybe by asking around I can find out about other possibilities. Her doctors aren't always as proactive as I'd like them to be.

    1. My thoughts. Sometimes it's an inquiry because you want to compare notes on how a certain medication has worked or not worked for someone else.

  7. Agree! We have had some therapists ask and actually be very negative because we ARE using medication. Guess what, if you're not an MD you're opinion on meds your opinions on meds are not ever going to weigh heavier than that of a doctor.

  8. I'm not a big fan of Doctors. Haven't really met one that has a handle on autism; And we've seen a lot of doctors. I'm curious what medications the non-doctors would be suggesting. My son has seizures so he has meds for those, but other than that I'm not sure what meds might be of any help. Lol, I guess this is more of an "I'm disappointed in doctors" reply. I have more faith in my wife's ability to figure out and solve my son's issues. To date, she's been 100% correct about everything.

  9. YEEEESSSSSSS! For years I got asked that about my ASD/ADHD/anxious kid. For him, it is definitely not the magic pill. For kids who "just" have ADD or ADHD, they work pretty well. Parents will say, "It's like night and day." For my kid, I say, "It's like night and later that night." When I was a teacher, not once did I ask a parent if their kid was on meds or suggest they go on meds. It's only a small part of the picture.

  10. It needs to be conducts awareness for Potty Training Autistic Child and outreach activities aimed at families, the governing body of a nation, and the public.

  11. I really find it a fine line between educating people further about autism and treatments for, and "mind your own effing business".
    Probably depends on how well the meds are working that day!

  12. I just had this happen today. My 5 year old daughter has autism and she had a substitute daycare teacher today. The sub asked me if autism is" something you can medicate for". I told her nope, but if you think you can invent it, you would be a billionaire. She looked offended, but I didn't punch her, so I consider it a win.