Come Monday I'll be holding you tight.
I spent four lonely days in a brown L.A. haze
And I just want you back by my side."
Stuff is not good at French Fry Inc. School has been dicey and today we reached a brand new level of suckatude when the Kiddo's anxiety spiked so bad this morning that I had to make the call not to send him to school. I have never seen him so upset. He was able to verbalize that he felt sad but what I also saw in his eyes was pure fear. I'm all about powering through stuff but there's a limit to what I will make my Kiddo and myself power through.
I won't lie. I am very frightened to what is going on at school. I know this is a major transition and these things take time for an autistic kid to adjust. I have spent more time on the phone either emailing, texting, or calling folks about this. My smartphone literally groans every time I go to pick it up.
We're making some medication changes but even those take time to kick in. Same thing with getting an FBA done. Even once the recommendations are made, that the steps will take some time before we start seeing their effects on the Kiddo and his behavior.
Kiddo is now very calm. No, relieved is a better word that he is home. He has asked to go to school on Monday and seems ready to go that day. I really hope so. I keep asking for folks to give my Kiddo a chance but that's hard to do if he's not there. So I am really hoping that come Monday he will be willing to go.
I feel like we are starting over with autism. I feel like we are back at square one when the word "autism" was first brought up. And I hate it. I have cried so many tears and lost so much sleep in the past few weeks that the bags under my eyes are now bigger than my boobs and that's saying something. Cause I got a rack.
I feel like I lost him and I am desperate to get him back. Just hang on Kiddo. I just want you there by my side come Monday.
Hey Kiddo, if you're gonna get into watching blenders on YouTube, could you look up a good recipe for a Margarita for me? Take me to Margaritaville?